“Who
let the dogs out?”
Sher
Khan
2005/06/21
In a remote village of the
Indian Subcontinent, lived a wise man who was well versed in science, politics
and history. Above all he knew English very well. In many countries, knowing
English is a sign of intelligence, proof that one is a knowledgeable person. The
neighboring village also had a self-proclaimed wise man but who instead was not
knowledgeable at all.
One day, the fake wise man
challenged the real wise man to participate in a “Translation from English to
native language” competition. The real wise man was reluctant to engage in
such silliness, but nonetheless agreed after local well-wishers begged him to
defend the honor of their village.
Soon, both competitors met
in a common area where hundreds of people from both villages had anxiously
gathered. The real wise man politely took his seat while the fake wise man
entered with a band of musicians equipped with trumpet, kettle drums, bugles and
what not.
The competition started
after sunset. The real wise man had the privilege of asking the first question.
“What” – he asked, “is the meaning of ‘The sun sets in murky
water?’” The fake sage loudly answered in his native language.
Then, it was the fake wise
man’s turn. “Could you translate – he simply asked – “the meaning of
‘I don’t know?’” The real wise man innocently translated the
meaning in his native language without blinking an eye.
None of the villagers was
educated or could understand a word of English, but a second later, trumpets
blared and drums thundered, and there was a great hullabaloo, whereupon the fake
wise man declared himself the winner, grabbed the trophy and bolted away from
the audience.
Not until the next day was
the deception understood and did the fake wise man get a good thrashing from the
people of both villages.
***
I read this story somewhere
a long time ago. I don’t recall where or when exactly, but I do see an
astonishingly precise parallel between that fake wise man and the Muslim
apologists of today who often claim victory in Islamic debates. Most in fact,
have this uncanny ability to declare victory before any real debate begins or
any real case, either way, is presented.
One
Muslim might argue: “You're only
jealous because Muslims have the courage to fight and die for what they believe
in!” Well, a turkey is a type of
bird that looks like an oversized chicken. According to reliable farm sources,
it's not safe to give a bowl of water to the gobblers because they're liable to
dip their heads in and die of suffocation. In other words, they lack the
intelligence or instinct to pop their heads up in time. I wonder, isn't such
stupidity similar to that of the suicide bombers? Well, it really doesn't matter
how these (suicide bomber) turkeys want to die, the problem arises when they
take others who are unwilling to die with them.
Another
Muslim claims: “You have intentionally mistranslated and misrepresented many
Hadith and Quranic verses”. How can that be when everyone uses the same
translations - by Yusuf Ali, Pikhtal, Shakir, Muhsin Khan or even Rashad Khalafa?
All the above scholars played the same music with minimum variation. Those
translators should face the charges of mistranslation and not us. If the Quran
howls - “kill,” we understand that the Quran is no good because killing is
bad. How does mistranslation or misrepresentation fit into the picture?
Some
Muslims allege that their faith only gets bolstered when we critique Islam. This
is utterly baffling to me, how can someone's faith become stronger when it is
proven through their own sacred texts that they are following a criminal? How
can that increase pride instead of causing shame?
Some
claim that they are non-practicing Muslims. This can be a truthful statement and
deserves appreciation. They're scared to follow the real Islam and categorically
deny any involvement with its brutal teachings. The majority of Muslims are of
this group and they are the ones who need to be pulled out of the Islamic swamp.
Dr.
Jackal NIKE of
India
is a famous Islamist who's made a name for himself by peddling Islamic trash
and yakking as guest scholar in a great many lecture halls around the world. The
man, fortunately unrelated to NIKE, the footwear giant of the
USA
, is indeed a shrewd jackal that I must admit. There he is afraid of debating
with ex-Muslims on the Internet, but nonetheless celebrated by countless fans
trumpeting his victories! It takes genius to transform defeat by forfeit into
victory by fanfare!
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