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Jen

Hi,

Is this Ali Sina?

Let me just say, what a wonderful site your “rational thinking” site is.  What a shock, and strangely enough almost a comfort, let me explain.

Recently I was in a relationship with a Saudi.  I really loved him. He was so sweet and kind.  But there was always something about his religion that drove me nuts.  I happened to say something about Muhammad in a discussion we were having one time and he told me “not to cross that line.”  I was raised catholic but am an agnostic so it was almost easier for me to see his side than for him to see mine. (Which may have something to do with him being 1 a man, and 2 an arab, excuse me if that is offensive, i am having a really hard time seeing the differences between arab and muslim)  Anyway, recently he attained a scholarship (with the help of his mother not his brain) from the saudi gov. immediatly after this he told me that his mother wanted him to come home and get married. He never told his mother about me. Breaking up was the hardest thing I ever had to do.  It’s still hard to get over, but I left for this reason, he told me that the most important thing in his life is his country, then god, then his family.  I told him that he was insane. My friend said it was brainwash.

Since the break up I’ve been looking for reasons to believe that it was a far far better thing to be without him rather than with, your site has helped a lot, Amensty International has been a big help too. if you have time could you possibly clear up the difference between Muslim and Arab. And why do Muslims treat women like they do? Big questions I know.

How do you feel about the way Muslims feel about Isreal? My boyfriend used to say he would never trust a Jew, it really bothered me.

Thank You so much for providing this site. If you are too busy to respond I understand.

If there is a God, I hope he is taking care of you :)

jen

 

Dear Jen,

Consider splitting from your Saudi Boyfriend as wining a lottery. And you are right; Islam is the Arab Instrument of domination. Saudi Arabs are racists and haughty people. Theoretically all Muslims are equal. But ask from any Muslim of other countries who has worked in SA and they will tell you that Saudis do not view them as equal. This is of course worse when you are not even a Muslim.

Many Western women fall in love with the Saudi men because they are wealthy but marrying a Muslim is like playing a Russian roulette. If you marry a man who is very religious you can be sure that you will have a very unhappy life. This is generally true for Muslim men irrespective of their nationality but Saudis are the worst.

You should not judge all men with an Arabic name the same way. Middle Eastern men can be very affectionate and loving if they are not Muslims or at least do not follow the teachings of Quran literally. Islam is a misogynist religion and women are not valued much. Muhammad himself used to think that women are deficient in intelligence and they constitute the majority of the inhabitants of the hell. He thought that women will be punished by Allah fo ever because they are not obedient to their husbands who provides for them. He even instructed his followers to scourge their wives if they are disobedient. Of course because according to this holy messenger women are deficient in intelligence their testimony in the court is worth half of that of a man and their inheritance is also half of them. Muslim men have been brought up with this kind of indoctrination for 1400 years and the change cannot come overnight.

I wonder if you have read or seen the movie “Not Without My Daughter” by Betty Mahmoudi. If you haven’t, you should before dating another Muslim man. Last year I came to know an American lady in one of the Yahoo Clubs. She was married to a Saudi pilot and had converted to Islam. She was complaining that after 14 years, and three children, and after sacrificing so much to save some money, his husband now in his 40s has married a younger girl in his 20s. According to Islam he can do that and he need not seek her first wife’s permission. She could not leave SA because she needed her husband’s approval and he would not let her go with the kids. Funny thing was that this poor woman was still defending Islam without realizing that her wows were direct consequence of the teachings of that religion. 

I suggest write to few white women who have married with a Saudi Muslim man for the last two decades and let them tell you how is their lives. Of course many of them are so brainwashed that despite being beaten occasionally and despite having to share their husband with one or more other women and despite having lost all their liberties think that this is normal. In fact since all American women who have married to Muslim men share this miserable life, it is normal to them. But certainly their happiness is thwarted when compared to the happiness of a liberated woman in the West.

You can have a very happy life with a Middle Eastern man if he is no more a Muslim or his faith is Islam is nominal. But if he is a fanatic and loves Muhammad and constantly speaks about his religion, shun him as if you shun disaster.

One thing that the Western girls do not understand is that though Muslim men can be charming and are good expenders (if they come from oil rich countries) they do not start the relationship with commitment. You are for them just a pastime, a pretty toy to keep them company while they are away from home. But when it comes to marriage, they think of Muslim girls. Even if they sincerely like you, their families will not allow them to marry you. They will arrange a marriage for them with another Muslim girl from back home. But if he truly loves you and marries you, you will still have a hellish life being accepted by his bigot family. Then you have to be always ready share him with a younger woman 15 or 20 years down the road, when you have lost you’re your youthfulness and chances and you can do nothing about it.

Dear Jen, consider yourself lucky for not marrying that Saudi man and warn your friends before they fall in love with a Muslim man. As for your question why Muslims treat women they way they do, I recommend reading the articles in the section dedicated to Women in this site. 

I wish you the best of luck.

 Regards,

 

Ali Sina

 

 

 

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