Why I Left Islam

By Ali Sina

I am often asked, why I left Islam?  As absurd as it may be, some Muslims cannot even allow themselves to think that leaving Islam is an option, or even possible.  They would rather think that those who leave Islam are paid Jewish agents than accept the fact that people have freedom to think and some may even think that Islam is not for them.  The following are my reasons:   

Until few years ago I used to think that my faith in Islam was not based on blind imitation but rather was the result of years of investigation and research.  The fact that I read a lot of books on Islam, written by people whose thoughts I approved of and delving into philosophies that were within my comfort zone, emphasized my conviction that I had found the truth.  All my biased research confirmed my faith.  Just like other Muslims, I used to believe that to learn about anything one has to go to the source.  Now you may think that the source of Islam is the Qur’an and the hadith.  That might be so in theory.  But in practice few Muslims read these books to understand them.  Muslims get their information about Islam by reading the books written by scholars of Islam. These are apologetic books that deceitfully try to portray Islam in the best light, showing that Muhammad was a holy man and the Qur’an is a "scientific book." Therefore, I felt no need to look elsewhere in order to find the truth, as I was convinced that I had already found it.  As Muslims say “Talabe ilm ba’d az wossule ma’loom mazmoom.”  The search for knowledge after gaining it is unwise. 

Now I realize this was a mistake.  What if we want to learn the truth about one of these dangerous cults? Is it enough to depend only on what the cult leader and his deluded followers say?  Wouldn’t it be prudent to widen our research and find out what other people have to say about them?  Going to the source makes sense only in scientific matters, because scientists are not “believers.”  They do not say something because they have blind faith.  Scientists make a critical analysis of the evidence.  It is very different from the religious approach which is based entirely on faith and belief.

I suppose it was my acquaintance with the western humanistic values that made me more sensitive and whetted my appetite for democracy, freethinking, human rights, equality, etc.  It was when I reread the Qur’an that I came across injunctions that were not on a par with my newfound humanistic values.  I was distressed and felt uncomfortable to read teachings like these:

Note:  I have not verified your quotes.

Q.3:90
But those who reject Faith after they accepted it, and then go on adding to their defiance of Faith,- never will their repentance be accepted; for they are those who have gone astray.

 Q.16: 106
Any one who, after accepting faith in Allah, utters Unbelief,- except under compulsion, his heart remaining firm in Faith - but such as open their breast to Unbelief, on them is Wrath from Allah, and theirs will be a dreadful Penalty.

One may think that the dreadful penalty mentioned here pertains to the next world.  But Muhammad made sure that these people received their penalty in this world as well:

 9.14
Fight them, and Allah will punish them by your hands, cover them with shame, help you (to victory) over them, heal the breasts of Believers,

There are also Hadiths that clearly say  " So, wherever you find them, kill them, for there will be a reward for their killers on the Day of Resurrection."  

Elsewhere we read: 
Sahih Bukhari Volume 4, Book 52, Number 260:

Ali burnt some people and this news reached Ibn 'Abbas, who said, "Had I been in his place I would not have burnt them, as the Prophet said, 'Don't punish (anybody) with Allah's Punishment.' No doubt, I would have killed them, for the Prophet said, 'If somebody (a Muslim) discards his religion, kill him.' "

I found many tales of brutality of Muhammad like this story: 

Sahih Bukhari Volume 4, Book 52, Number 261:

Eight men of the tribe of 'Ukil came to the Prophet and then they found the climate of Medina unsuitable for them. So, they said, "O Allah's Apostle! Provide us with some milk." Allah's Apostle said, "I recommend that you should join the herd of camels." So they went and drank the urine and the milk of the camels (as a medicine) till they became healthy and fat. Then they killed the shepherd and drove away the camels, and they became unbelievers after they were Muslims. When the Prophet was informed by a shouter for help, he sent some men in their pursuit, and before the sun rose high, they were brought, and he had their hands and feet cut off. Then he ordered for nails, which were heated and passed over their eyes, and they were left in the Harra (i.e. rocky land in Medina). They asked for water, and nobody provided them with water till they died. 

And from partial translation of Sunan Abu-Dawud Book 38, Number 4339

Narrated Aisha, Ummul Mu'minin:
The Apostle of Allah (peace_be_upon_him) Said: The blood of a Muslim man who testifies that there is no god but Allah and that Muhammad is Allah's Apostle should not lawfully be shed except only for one of three reasons: a man who committed fornication after marriage, in which case he should be stoned; one who goes forth to fight with Allah and His Apostle, in which case he should be killed or crucified or exiled from the land; or one who commits murder for which he is killed.

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